"rosie readandpost" <readandpost@REMOVETHISyahoo.com> wrote in message
news:SqBLa.153408$Xl.2404111@twister.rdc-kc.rr.com...
> > I have tried AA and feel that I
> > haven't reached a stage where sobriety is the foremost priority in my
life.
>
>
> pauly,
> then what are you really looking for?
> "normies" don't need to look for RECOVERY from alcoholism. they don't
even question it!
I'm looking for contentment away from alcohol and drugs. I do however feel I
need to question the extent of my problem.We are not all at the same stage
in our alcoholism, there are different degrees.
> >In AA sobrity seems to be the main
> > focus, which for some hard core alcoholics may be needed.
>
>
> that is exactly what AA is for, us "hard core" alcoholics.
> not you?
> then don't worry about a thing!
I fail to see how someone who decsribed cold turkeying alcohol a breeze
compared to smoking can describe themselves as hardcore. I nearly died from
the 'turkey' and was on 24 hr bedwatch because of seizures it was a hell I
would have readily swapped for nicotine withrawal. I don't class myself as a
'hardcore' alcoholic. As alcoholism is a progressive condition, I feel that
mine hasn't yet become chronic and doesn't need the same treatment as one
who's condition ghas become chronic. This doesn't mean I am not alcoholic.
> is it me?
> YOU BET!
I can't find this in my original post to reply to. Maybe I can't see the
wood for all those bloody trees.
> >Our self help/support group
> > climate is creating problems where they do not exist.
>
>
>
> this is nonsense!
> "normies" do not get involved in self help groups, and if they
accidentally do, it doesn't take long and they "are out
> of there"
> don't need it? don't go!
>
My point exactly. As an example of the differences between our victim
cultures, we still call carb addicts gluttons here. Is there support group
for that? I think we have one it's called weight watchers:-)
>
>
>
>
> >Just look at Attention
> > Defecit Disorder, if you present yourself for treatment of this real
illness
> > then in all likelyhood you will be diagnosed as having it.
> <
>
> this old argument?
> almost always argued by folks who do not have children affected by ADHD.
> its none of our business, but i am grateful that there is a place for
parents with affected children to turn.
> do you even have children?
I have a perfectly healthy 12 year old daughter who displays all of the
symptoms described in the link in my original post as I did and almost every
intelligent child I know. Don't tell me you have a child with ADHD.
I'm sure it is a real condition that affects some people terribly, but these
things are all too often excuses.
> pauly,
> lets stick to you and your presence here in a recovery from alcoholism
support group................why are you here?
> what do you wish to accomplish? what were the results of YOUR assessment?
> i hope you find your answers, but according to you, you truly don't have a
problem with alcoholism and if you find you
> do, you will use the "bootstrap method" for a "cure",
> best of luck to you!
I do have a problem with alcohol. What seems to be the consensus, which I am
disagreeing with, is that, if it is a problem which I think I can make go
away by doing something other than working the 12 steps, then it isn't a
REAL problem. I want sobriety to not take up all my time and thinking.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> read and post daily, it works!
> rosie
>
> bitterness imprisons life; love releases it.
> ..................... harry emerson fosdick
>
>
>
> "pauly" <paul.youles@REMOVETHISvirgin.net> wrote in message
news:EYALa.6027$sh4.529503@newsfep2-win.server.ntli.net...
> > that read like a bit of a diatribe against AA didn't it? It was in fact
> > against the whole support group/victim climate. It is hard sometimes to
get
> > a feeling accross on a NG. I have done a lot of thinking about the
> > different courses of action i may take. I am lucky to have a friend who
is
> > in the top ranks of the NHS front line, dealing with drug and alcohol
abuse
> > who has been a bit of a guide for me. I have tried AA and feel that I
> > haven't reached a stage where sobriety is the foremost priority in my
life.
> > Booze was never the most important thing, so neither should sobriety be.
I
> > would like to live my life as a normal person for whom not getting drunk
is
> > coincedental to the rest of my life. In AA sobrity seems to be the main
> > focus, which for some hard core alcoholics may be needed. What AA
wrongly
> > tried to tell me was that I wouldn't get well if I didn't do the 90 in
90
> > and keep coming back. What my friend told me, and he has the advantage
that
> > non of his clients are anonymous (to him anyway), is that the majority
of
> > people who have turned their lives around from alcoholism, have done it
> > without AA, and that most even do it by practising controlled drinking.
It
> > is only the hard core addict who has had countless detoxes, for whom
total
> > abstinence is the only answer. Most can and do get well without
practising
> > total abstinence. The NHS view is, as alcohol is so prevalent in todays
> > society and that people in their teens are reglarly presenting
themselves
> > for detox and after care, that it is not realistic to tell a 19 year old
> > that abstinence is the only answer. If the 19 year old is told about no
> > other way of getting away from addiction, then when he/she relapses, the
old
> > drinking pattern will emerge quickly, and then BANG, another detox ad
> > infinitum. Most can and do learn that the odd few drinks won't and don't
> > hurt. Some of course can't do this, both types of drinker can be classed
as
> > alcoholics but the treatment is different. The medical view is also that
> > only people who have had to do a supervised detox, are actually
alcoholic
> > and that many who end up in treatment, esp where the only qualification
is
> > the desire to stop drinking, don't actually need that treatment. It is
the
> > treatment here creating the need for treatment. Our self help/support
group
> > climate is creating problems where they do not exist. Just look at
Attention
> > Defecit Disorder, if you present yourself for treatment of this real
illness
> > then in all likelyhood you will be diagnosed as having it. Have you ever
> > seen a questionaire aimed at finding whether your child has ADHD, there
> > isn't a parent in the land who wouldn't condemn their child to a life of
> > ritalin addiction if they filled one of these questionaires in correctly
or
> > read about the symptoms as they will apply to nearly all healthy
> > children.http://www.nimh.nih.gov/publicat/adhd.cfm#adhd3 It is often
used as
> > an excuse for bad parenting.
> > When Bi Polar disorder was called manic depression, far fewer people
had
> > it. Being Bi Polar sounds so much more attractive doesn't it? I have
never
> > met anyone in this country (UK) who is lactose intolerant, but it
seemed
> > that evey American I met in the States was. The USA seems to be leading
the
> > world as the country of 'Disorders'. We will follow behind assured that
> > there are networks available to help us. It does seem that the more
wealth
> > we create the smaller and more important our problems become. You will
never
> > meet a poor person who is lactose intolerant. I am not trying to
belittle
> > the condition of alcoholism. I know from experience how destrucive it
can
> > be, but just because you regularly drink over the prescribed 28 units of
> > alcohol per week doen't necessarily mean that you have a problem. Our
> > victim way of thinking is increasingly using disorders such as
alcoholism as
> > an excuse for other parts of our personality that are lacking.
> > Now that did turn into a diatribe didn't it? :-)And here's me
posting to
> > a support newsgroup what a bloody hypocrite.
> >
> > "pauly" <paul.youles@REMOVETHISvirgin.net> wrote in message
> > news:pWqLa.387$Ij7.54993@newsfep1-win.server.ntli.net...
> > > If you want to be going to 3+ meetings a week for the rest of your
life or
> > > be a bum, then carry on going to AA. If you actually want to get well
try
> > > something else. My mind has been out on the AA thing for some time,
but as
> > I
> > > am not willing to release responsibility for my addiction to a higher
> > power,
> > > I just don't fit in. I have now decided that AA is not for me, it
> > apparently
> > > does work for some people, though not many, if it works for you then
fine,
> > > but if you have started beating yourself up about it like I did then
maybe
> > > its time to follow a different path, like just getting on with your
life,
> > > and making sobriety a coincidental nicety, and not the be all; and end
> > all.
> > > "John Smith" <i_user@hotmail.com> wrote in message
> > > news:zMiLa.338592$Vi5.8583147@news1.calgary.shaw.c a...
> > > > Hi:
> > > >
> > > > I've only been in AA a month, and stayed sober the whole time. But I
> > have
> > > > some questions that I guess I'll post here because I don't know who
or
> > how
> > > > to ask at AA. (Also, Robert McGregor, please don't post insulting
> > > derogatory
> > > > answers like you do to everyone.)
> > > >
> > > > Stupid Question #1:
> > > > What is the real job of a sponsor? There is this guy who is my
sponsor,
> > > but
> > > > I don't really understand the relationship very much. He tells me
stuff
> > to
> > > > do, but some of it, I'm not comfortable doing, such as phoning
complete
> > > > strangers in AA and introducing myself. I am supposed to check in
with
> > him
> > > > every few days, but that feels kind of strange to me. Obviously I
don't
> > > want
> > > > to ask him this question.
> > > >
> > > > Stupid Question #2:
> > > > What is the purpose of what is called a Home Group? Lots of people
are
> > > > telling me to join a "Home Group", but I don't understand what that
> > means.
> > > > How is that different from just going to meetings? Why do people in
this
> > > > Home Group want my home phone number?
> > > >
> > > > Stupid Question #3:
> > > > How many meetings should I go to? I hear about people going to 90
> > meetings
> > > > in 90 days, and some going to 2 or more meetings a day. I can't do
this
> > > with
> > > > my schedule and my family. Does that mean that AA won't work for me?
> > > >
> > > > Stupid Question #4:
> > > > I am craving a drink so badly now, that I even dream about it. Is
that
> > > > normal? I dreamed about whiskey all night. I would never tell anyone
at
> > an
> > > > AA meeting about that because they all seem to "get it" with these
steps
> > > and
> > > > stuff. I don't seem to be "getting it" and I don't know why. I've
been
> > > going
> > > > to 3 - 5 meetings a week, and my wife is getting pissed at the time
away
> > > > from home. But I can't seem to make the connection (to quote Oprah).
> > What
> > > am
> > > > I missing? This is a harder question for me to articulate, but
somehow I
> > > > just don't experience what all these other people experience. Does
this
> > > mean
> > > > that I am one of the "poor unfortunates" that they read from "How it
> > > Works"
> > > > in every meeting?
> > > >
> > > >
> > >
> > >
> >
> >
>
>