Re: Brick Wall

[Dan Ballance]

On Mon, 23 Jun 2003 23:38:46 +1000, "BaldMonkey" <BaldMonkey@gigpond>
wrote:

>Today, 3 months 1 week 1day sober & clean. This is my second time that I
>have really tried to get into and stay in recovery. The previous time was
>around 9 months - a time of hell and misery because I denied who I was.
>

well hats off to you mr! I have done three months twice in the past,
but no longer than that, only on about 10 or 11 days now... as others
here know, im already loosing motivation. nice one mate ;-)

dan

[debs]

Be yourself and stay sober for yourself.

debs

--
Illegitimi non Carborundum
"Dan Ballance" <DanBallance@noSpamexcite.com> wrote in message
news:gkkifv0iem1oumj5l4sikbtmil7tf82met@4ax.com...
> On Mon, 23 Jun 2003 23:38:46 +1000, "BaldMonkey" <BaldMonkey@gigpond>
> wrote:
>
> >Today, 3 months 1 week 1day sober & clean. This is my second time that I
> >have really tried to get into and stay in recovery. The previous time
was
> >around 9 months - a time of hell and misery because I denied who I was.
> >
>
> well hats off to you mr! I have done three months twice in the past,
> but no longer than that, only on about 10 or 11 days now... as others
> here know, im already loosing motivation. nice one mate ;-)
>
> dan

[rosie readandpost]

>... as others
> here know, im already loosing motivation. nice one mate ;-)
>
> dan


dan,
do you intend to do anything about it?

concerned,
rosie

[Dan Ballance]

hi rosie, i'm attending addaction regularly (a drug and alcohol
service near me). I'm starting an anxiety mangement course next week
(major trigger for me) and relapse prevention the week after. They're
good people there.

Thing is, everything is actually going really well. I just don't seem
to be able to settle for total abstinence. I'm really toying with the
idea of attempting a fornightly drink. Abstinence would be better, but
if I can stick to one session a fortnight, there would be no major
repercussions on the rest of my life.

I suppose the issue is whether I can actually stay with once a
fortnight. I've got too much to loose now, to piss it all up the wall
again. I really don' think I would.

Is this denial and the alcoholic in me talking?

Or is this a reasonable objective to attempt, with support from
Addaction, so that if it starts to go wrong I jump straight back out
of the fire and get back to a total abstinece objective?

i really don't know...

thanks for your reply,,
dan ;-)

On Wed, 25 Jun 2003 12:28:13 GMT, "rosie readandpost"
<readandpost@REMOVETHISyahoo.com> wrote:

>
>>... as others
>> here know, im already loosing motivation. nice one mate ;-)
>>
>> dan
>
>
>dan,
>do you intend to do anything about it?
>
>concerned,
>rosie
>

[rosie readandpost]

> I suppose the issue is whether I can actually stay with once a
> fortnight. I've got too much to loose now, to piss it all up the wall
> again. I really don' think I would.
>
> Is this denial and the alcoholic in me talking?
>
>

yup to both, IF you are an alcoholic.
have you talked at your recovery support group about this "drinking" plan?
i believe that MOST alcoholics i know, have tried controlled drinking to no avail, and try i did!
:)

i was relieved to finally STOP my "controlled drinking experiments" and adapt abstinence as my daily plan.
but I made that decision, and NO ONE ELSE.

rosie