Day 3 and depression.

[Roger1]

I just read Crystal's post below (18/8) and I am also in day 3 at the
moment. I feel very very depressed and am really not doing very much at
all. I have a strange dry taste in my mouth (so decided not to give up
the cigarettes - one problem at a time).

I am not eating very much but am drinking lots of liquids - water,
tomato juice, coca cola.

I used to eat far less when drinking so my appetite is probably a lot
less than it should be.

I called AA today and am going to my first meeting tomorrow so that
should be interesting and hopefully helpful!

I realize there is a debate regarding moderation versus abstaining
totally; but having tried and failed to moderate myself before, I'll try
abstaining totally this time.

However, my main question is regarding the depression. I have been
depressed for a number of years (been in therapy and on anti-depressants
which didn't seem to help). Why do I feel so much worse specifically
today? Is there a reason? You can say it is the detoxing process, but
I've been sober for longer than 3 days before (in fact earlier this
month) and I'm sure I never felt so depressed then. Any ideas?

[David M]

Roger1 wrote:

> I realize there is a debate regarding moderation versus
> abstaining totally; but having tried and failed to moderate
> myself before, I'll try abstaining totally this time.

> However, my main question is regarding the depression. I
> have been depressed for a number of years (been in therapy
> and on anti-depressants which didn't seem to help). Why do
> I feel so much worse specifically today? Is there a reason?
> You can say it is the detoxing process, but I've been sober
> for longer than 3 days before (in fact earlier this month) and
> I'm sure I never felt so depressed then. Any ideas?

When you were sober earlier this month, did you think you would
sooner or later be able to return to moderate drinking? And now, do
you believe you need to be abstinent forever?

Does that depress you?

[rosie read n' post]

giving up drinking as a way of escape can be depressing itself!
if you have been diagnosed as clinically depressed you might want to let
your physician know that you have now quite drinking.

congrats on your decision to quit!

--




"Roger1" <roger1@noonehere.xxx> wrote in message
news:rLINe.1339$i1.343@newsfe3-gui.ntli.net...
> I just read Crystal's post below (18/8) and I am also in day 3 at the
> moment. I feel very very depressed and am really not doing very much
at
> all. I have a strange dry taste in my mouth (so decided not to give
up
> the cigarettes - one problem at a time).
>
> I am not eating very much but am drinking lots of liquids - water,
> tomato juice, coca cola.
>
> I used to eat far less when drinking so my appetite is probably a lot
> less than it should be.
>
> I called AA today and am going to my first meeting tomorrow so that
> should be interesting and hopefully helpful!
>
> I realize there is a debate regarding moderation versus abstaining
> totally; but having tried and failed to moderate myself before, I'll
try
> abstaining totally this time.
>
> However, my main question is regarding the depression. I have been
> depressed for a number of years (been in therapy and on
anti-depressants
> which didn't seem to help). Why do I feel so much worse specifically
> today? Is there a reason? You can say it is the detoxing process,
but
> I've been sober for longer than 3 days before (in fact earlier this
> month) and I'm sure I never felt so depressed then. Any ideas?

[Dudley Do Rite]

Way cool! Go to your first meeting tomorrow. If you're lucky, you'll be as
stunned as I was during my first meeting. They get it. They've been there.
You can't tell them anything new about your drinkalog, that they haven't
done themselves.

And it'll make you feel better. It made me feel better. I knew then -
after meeting #1 - that I wasn't alone anymore.

Check in afterward and let us know how it went!

steve

"Roger1" <roger1@noonehere.xxx> wrote in message
news:rLINe.1339$i1.343@newsfe3-gui.ntli.net...
>I just read Crystal's post below (18/8) and I am also in day 3 at the
>moment. I feel very very depressed and am really not doing very much at
>all. I have a strange dry taste in my mouth (so decided not to give up the
>cigarettes - one problem at a time).
>
> I am not eating very much but am drinking lots of liquids - water, tomato
> juice, coca cola.
>
> I used to eat far less when drinking so my appetite is probably a lot less
> than it should be.
>
> I called AA today and am going to my first meeting tomorrow so that should
> be interesting and hopefully helpful!
>
> I realize there is a debate regarding moderation versus abstaining
> totally; but having tried and failed to moderate myself before, I'll try
> abstaining totally this time.
>
> However, my main question is regarding the depression. I have been
> depressed for a number of years (been in therapy and on anti-depressants
> which didn't seem to help). Why do I feel so much worse specifically
> today? Is there a reason? You can say it is the detoxing process, but
> I've been sober for longer than 3 days before (in fact earlier this month)
> and I'm sure I never felt so depressed then. Any ideas?

[Roger1]

David M wrote:

>Roger1 wrote:
>
>
>
>>I realize there is a debate regarding moderation versus
>>abstaining totally; but having tried and failed to moderate
>>myself before, I'll try abstaining totally this time.
>>
>>
>
>
>
>>However, my main question is regarding the depression. I
>>have been depressed for a number of years (been in therapy
>>and on anti-depressants which didn't seem to help). Why do
>>I feel so much worse specifically today? Is there a reason?
>>You can say it is the detoxing process, but I've been sober
>>for longer than 3 days before (in fact earlier this month) and
>>I'm sure I never felt so depressed then. Any ideas?
>>
>>
>
>When you were sober earlier this month, did you think you would
>sooner or later be able to return to moderate drinking? And now, do
>you believe you need to be abstinent forever?
>
>Does that depress you?
>
>
>
>
I believe you are right. I never before considered giving up
completely. And now I realize that is the best solution. I guess that
this makes me depressed since alcohol gives one pleasure (in the short
term at least). After all the feeling of drunkenness is quite pleasant,
so I used it as a crutch to help me cope, and at this moment in time, it
has been removed for ever. .

[Roger1]

Dudley Do Rite wrote:

>Way cool! Go to your first meeting tomorrow. If you're lucky, you'll be as
>stunned as I was during my first meeting. They get it. They've been there.
>You can't tell them anything new about your drinkalog, that they haven't
>done themselves.
>
>And it'll make you feel better. It made me feel better. I knew then -
>after meeting #1 - that I wasn't alone anymore.
>
>Check in afterward and let us know how it went!
>
>steve
>
>
>

Yes, it was very good; everyone was very kind. It seems more of a
community with people swapping phone numbers and being very kind such as
letting me call them, offering to meet socially during the week and so
forth. There also seems to be so many meetings to attend - here in
London. And I was surprised that some people attend meetings 5-10 times
per week. To them, being sober is kind of what they do, because it
allows them to have a decent life, compared to before.

I'll go to a different meeting tomorrow, and hopefully that will also be
good.

One of the interesting things I noticed from the booklet they gave me
with the meeting details in it, was how many meetings are located in the
business districts of London. It seems as if many wealthy and powerful
people have such a problem, which I found unexpected. I know that pop
singers and other entertainers often used alcohol to deal with stress,
but didn't realize that businesspeople who have a structured daily
routine also had such a significant problem. I think that is because I
wonder(ed) how people can function when they have to be at work from say
8am-8pm, five days per week.

I certainly look forward to getting to the 7 days level and so on. Now
I am going to have a read of "Living Sober".

I still feel tired now at 4:30pm, and I fell asleep yesterday at 8pm and
slept on and off until about 7am - 10ish hours of sleep is unusual for
me. Is this normal?

>"Roger1" <roger1@noonehere.xxx> wrote in message
>news:rLINe.1339$i1.343@newsfe3-gui.ntli.net...
>
>
>>I just read Crystal's post below (18/8) and I am also in day 3 at the
>>moment. I feel very very depressed and am really not doing very much at
>>all. I have a strange dry taste in my mouth (so decided not to give up the
>>cigarettes - one problem at a time).
>>
>>I am not eating very much but am drinking lots of liquids - water, tomato
>>juice, coca cola.
>>
>>I used to eat far less when drinking so my appetite is probably a lot less
>>than it should be.
>>
>>I called AA today and am going to my first meeting tomorrow so that should
>>be interesting and hopefully helpful!
>>
>>I realize there is a debate regarding moderation versus abstaining
>>totally; but having tried and failed to moderate myself before, I'll try
>>abstaining totally this time.
>>
>>However, my main question is regarding the depression. I have been
>>depressed for a number of years (been in therapy and on anti-depressants
>>which didn't seem to help). Why do I feel so much worse specifically
>>today? Is there a reason? You can say it is the detoxing process, but
>>I've been sober for longer than 3 days before (in fact earlier this month)
>>and I'm sure I never felt so depressed then. Any ideas?
>>
>>
>
>
>
>

[David M]

Roger1 wrote:
> David M wrote:

>> When you were sober earlier this month, did you think you
>> would sooner or later be able to return to moderate
>> drinking? And now, do you believe you need to be
>> abstinent forever?

>> Does that depress you?

> I believe you are right. I never before considered giving up
> completely. And now I realize that is the best solution. I
> guess that this makes me depressed since alcohol gives one
> pleasure (in the short term at least). After all the feeling of
> drunkenness is quite pleasant, so I used it as a crutch to help
> me cope, and at this moment in time, it has been removed for
> ever. .

I continued to drink at the end not because drinking was pleasant
for me, but because not drinking was so unpleasant. Then I stopped.
I was over the sweating, shaking, nausea, insomnia within the first
week. But still I was left with a profound sense of loss.

For years I had organized my life around drinking. Now I had to
find something else.

Things will get better. Take it one day at a time. And find
something else to concentrate on. I'm not even sure it is important
what that something is. Helping others, work, family, politics,
religion -- each or in any combination can replace that empty
feeling.

[Dudley Do Rite]

I was suprised at the frequency some people go to meetings too... then I
found that I really enjoy going. To a degree - everything in moderation I
guess. And I do think sobriety is a better life - tough but better. Go to
a bunch of different meetings to find the ones you like and want to go to
repeatedly. I have my favorites now. The San Francisco Bay Area also has
meetings just about anytime, all over - we're blessed to be able to have
people to whom we can turn. Even when we just don't want to be alone. Some
of my good meetings have been when I've been "out of sorts" - I go to a
meeting, someone shares, and I realize I have nothing to complain about.
It's a sobering (pardon the pun) realization.

Economically, it's a suprise but not after reflecting on it. I am a very
successful businessman. At least, monetarily. I make a bunch of money,
have a bunch of nice toys, hang out in the high-falutin' circles. And life
sucked. I was angry, controlling and a bunch of other things. We are a
very high achieving bunch. And smart - think of how many people and times
you fooled those around you - including yourself. When we can channel our
intelligence and drive toward being a productive member of society, we aught
to be pretty awesome.

I celebrate 90 Days next week. I haven't fully "drunk the cool aid" yet but
I'm sure taking a lot of sips! It's been at least 25 years since I've ever
had zero alcohol for this many days at a stretch. That alone, is a miracle
worth holding on to and seeing what else is in store.

One day at a time. You had a good day, and you should be happy about that.
Now do the same thing again today. Worry about tomorrowwhen tomorrow
comes.

"Roger1" <roger1@noonehere.xxx> wrote in message
news:Pd1Oe.86$s4.57@newsfe4-gui.ntli.net...
> Dudley Do Rite wrote:
>
>>Way cool! Go to your first meeting tomorrow. If you're lucky, you'll be
>>as stunned as I was during my first meeting. They get it. They've been
>>there. You can't tell them anything new about your drinkalog, that they
>>haven't done themselves.
>>
>>And it'll make you feel better. It made me feel better. I knew then -
>>after meeting #1 - that I wasn't alone anymore.
>>
>>Check in afterward and let us know how it went!
>>
>>steve
>>
>>
>
> Yes, it was very good; everyone was very kind. It seems more of a
> community with people swapping phone numbers and being very kind such as
> letting me call them, offering to meet socially during the week and so
> forth. There also seems to be so many meetings to attend - here in
> London. And I was surprised that some people attend meetings 5-10 times
> per week. To them, being sober is kind of what they do, because it allows
> them to have a decent life, compared to before.
> I'll go to a different meeting tomorrow, and hopefully that will also be
> good.
>
> One of the interesting things I noticed from the booklet they gave me with
> the meeting details in it, was how many meetings are located in the
> business districts of London. It seems as if many wealthy and powerful
> people have such a problem, which I found unexpected. I know that pop
> singers and other entertainers often used alcohol to deal with stress, but
> didn't realize that businesspeople who have a structured daily routine
> also had such a significant problem. I think that is because I wonder(ed)
> how people can function when they have to be at work from say 8am-8pm,
> five days per week.
>
> I certainly look forward to getting to the 7 days level and so on. Now I
> am going to have a read of "Living Sober".
>
> I still feel tired now at 4:30pm, and I fell asleep yesterday at 8pm and
> slept on and off until about 7am - 10ish hours of sleep is unusual for me.
> Is this normal?
>
>>"Roger1" <roger1@noonehere.xxx> wrote in message
>>news:rLINe.1339$i1.343@newsfe3-gui.ntli.net...
>>
>>>I just read Crystal's post below (18/8) and I am also in day 3 at the
>>>moment. I feel very very depressed and am really not doing very much at
>>>all. I have a strange dry taste in my mouth (so decided not to give up
>>>the cigarettes - one problem at a time).
>>>
>>>I am not eating very much but am drinking lots of liquids - water, tomato
>>>juice, coca cola.
>>>
>>>I used to eat far less when drinking so my appetite is probably a lot
>>>less than it should be.
>>>
>>>I called AA today and am going to my first meeting tomorrow so that
>>>should be interesting and hopefully helpful!
>>>
>>>I realize there is a debate regarding moderation versus abstaining
>>>totally; but having tried and failed to moderate myself before, I'll try
>>>abstaining totally this time.
>>>
>>>However, my main question is regarding the depression. I have been
>>>depressed for a number of years (been in therapy and on anti-depressants
>>>which didn't seem to help). Why do I feel so much worse specifically
>>>today? Is there a reason? You can say it is the detoxing process, but
>>>I've been sober for longer than 3 days before (in fact earlier this
>>>month) and I'm sure I never felt so depressed then. Any ideas?
>>
>>
>>