pauly
07-09-2003, 01:35 AM
he didn't come back
"Bobby L." <BobbyL2000nospam@bellsouth.net> wrote in message
news:QYpOa.19$DF6.14@fe04.atl2.webusenet.com...
> So what happened after the meeting?
>
> Bobby L
>
>
> "pauly" <paul.youles@REMOVETHISvirgin.net> wrote in message
> news:ZWzJa.96$5q2.41469@newsfep1-win.server.ntli.net...
>
>
> I went to a small meeting on Saturday. It is one I usually like as it is
> very informal and the few people that are there get on very well. I was a
> little concerned on Saturday. A newcomer showed up, he smelt strongly of
> alcohol but was coherent, and didn't appear at all drunk. He did appear
very
> desperate though. It was his first meeting, and he admitted that he was
> sceptical of AA because of the religion thing. He said that he had tried
> everything but AA, and was looking at this as his last chance. He wasn't
> sure of the protocol, but instead of stopping and explaining that sharing
> wasn't a two way thing, people talked over him until he stopped
> interrupting. As a newcomer he had most of the sharers directing their
share
> right at him, so I think he could be forgiven for feeling he had to
respond,
> as it did seem to me that the whole meeting wanted to gear itself around
the
> new bloke. This would have been admirable, if anyone had allowed him to
> share, but as he talked at inappropriate times, he was talked down and
then
> instead of being invited to carry on when that person had finished, other
> people jumped straight in to share. I mentioned earlier that he had voiced
> concern about the higher power/god concept. In a normally non
denominational
> meeting, nearly all the shares involved talking about higher powers as
GOD,
> and most went on to mention their denomination and even the church they
> attend. Some sounded like specifically religious sermons. Although I am
> pretty new myself, I do understand that this is not the norm, but if I had
> been that newcomer I would have run a mile. I tried to speak to explain
this
> but couldn't manage to cut in. I did feel that as the other newcomer It
> shouldn't have been left to me anyway. At the end came the coup de grace.
> The chair raised the issue of any other matters/ announcements, and said
> that he would close the meeting after that. At this point the newcomer
asked
> politely if he could say something before the close. The chair refused him
> this and said that he really ought to close the meeting as he had to be
> somewhere. I at this point asked if anyone else minded the newcomer
> speaking, of course no one else objected and he got to speak. I am really
> concerned that this person got a really bad first impression, and will not
> come back. Any suggestions on handling a situation like this would be
> appreciated. I know ono one can tell me what to do, but an idea of what
you
> would have done in that same situation would be helpful.
>
> PS Sorry about the length of the post
>
>
he didn't come back
"Bobby L." <BobbyL2000nospam@bellsouth.net> wrote in message
news:QYpOa.19$DF6.14@fe04.atl2.webusenet.com...
> So what happened after the meeting?
>
> Bobby L
>
>
> "pauly" <paul.youles@REMOVETHISvirgin.net> wrote in message
> news:ZWzJa.96$5q2.41469@newsfep1-win.server.ntli.net...
>
>
> I went to a small meeting on Saturday. It is one I usually like as it is
> very informal and the few people that are there get on very well. I was a
> little concerned on Saturday. A newcomer showed up, he smelt strongly of
> alcohol but was coherent, and didn't appear at all drunk. He did appear
very
> desperate though. It was his first meeting, and he admitted that he was
> sceptical of AA because of the religion thing. He said that he had tried
> everything but AA, and was looking at this as his last chance. He wasn't
> sure of the protocol, but instead of stopping and explaining that sharing
> wasn't a two way thing, people talked over him until he stopped
> interrupting. As a newcomer he had most of the sharers directing their
share
> right at him, so I think he could be forgiven for feeling he had to
respond,
> as it did seem to me that the whole meeting wanted to gear itself around
the
> new bloke. This would have been admirable, if anyone had allowed him to
> share, but as he talked at inappropriate times, he was talked down and
then
> instead of being invited to carry on when that person had finished, other
> people jumped straight in to share. I mentioned earlier that he had voiced
> concern about the higher power/god concept. In a normally non
denominational
> meeting, nearly all the shares involved talking about higher powers as
GOD,
> and most went on to mention their denomination and even the church they
> attend. Some sounded like specifically religious sermons. Although I am
> pretty new myself, I do understand that this is not the norm, but if I had
> been that newcomer I would have run a mile. I tried to speak to explain
this
> but couldn't manage to cut in. I did feel that as the other newcomer It
> shouldn't have been left to me anyway. At the end came the coup de grace.
> The chair raised the issue of any other matters/ announcements, and said
> that he would close the meeting after that. At this point the newcomer
asked
> politely if he could say something before the close. The chair refused him
> this and said that he really ought to close the meeting as he had to be
> somewhere. I at this point asked if anyone else minded the newcomer
> speaking, of course no one else objected and he got to speak. I am really
> concerned that this person got a really bad first impression, and will not
> come back. Any suggestions on handling a situation like this would be
> appreciated. I know ono one can tell me what to do, but an idea of what
you
> would have done in that same situation would be helpful.
>
> PS Sorry about the length of the post
>
>
he didn't come back