Hi,

What is the difference between a problem drinker and an alcoholic? I have
found that I drank instead of dealing with problems. When I have quit, I
felt no real physical withdrawal symptoms. I did have mental withdrawal
symptoms due to having to deal with the problems that I avoided.

Is there a good definition? I'm not trying do deny what I believe is true
about myself (alcoholic); I'm trying to decide if there really is a
difference and if there is, what that would be? And in my case, I don't
believe it does make a difference. Experience thas taught me that no matter
what I do to better myself, choosing to drink will undo everything that I
strive for in life. I will take the easy road instead of doing what is
necessary to help myself.

I remember alcohol related ads when I was younger, one comes to mind: If
you drink to be social, that isn't social drinking. That pretty much sums
me up. Afraid to interact when sober, give me a beer and I'll talk to
anyone. I don't even have to be drunk. Now, I have people telling me that
I have an anxiety disorder and need medication. Ack, just what I don't
want, another drug to make me feel "ok". I feel like I've programmed myself
and don't know how to unprogram myself. I've relied on alcohol to eliminate
the fear and now feel owned by that fear.

I want to know how to get out of being so ME centered. I'm so afraid of
what everyone thinks of ME. I never really realized it until I started
looking at the reasons for my breakup. I drank to avoid dealing with issues
that bothered me, was petty and selfish about a lot of things. So, even
without the booze or drugs, I'm still just me and still feel afraid of
almost everything and worry about what others think. I've been this way
since I was in high school. Yeah, about the time I started drinking to "fit
in".

Sometimes, I feel like a beer makes me feel like a "normal" person. I
don't like that and want to be able to interact without being altered. A
drink and I fear nothing, no longer doubt myself and am not afraid to fail.
I am so afraid of failing so I avoid life. How do you just get "over" it?
Just do it?

Just go to some meetings and listen? Be a resource for others that are
having a hard time dealing without drinking? Do some charity work and spoon
soup to people that have lost everything and given up? Go to work for Homes
for Humanity and build homes for the homeless?

I know there has to be more to life than avoiding everything unpleasant.
I've done it for so long, the pattern is hard to break.

Thanks for your support!

Kirk S. <once the drinking stops, the real work begins>

On Sat, 6 Mar 2004 11:43:50 -0600, "Kirk S."
<kspradling@nospamkc.rr.com> wrote:

>What is the difference between a problem drinker and an alcoholic?

A quick look at DSM IV offers a clue. "Problem drinker" = "alcohol
abuse", "alcoholic" = "alcohol dependency".

All alcoholics abuse alcohol, but not all alcohol abusers are
alcoholic. It gets confusing when those who are not alcoholic claim
they are. When the AA book was written there was no status symbol
attached to being "recovering alcoholic", it would be like someone in
the late '80s announcing "I'm recovering from AIDS". Yes, AA today
can be like an AIDS self-help group with people trying to get in
pretending to have AIDS.

>Now, I have people telling me that
>I have an anxiety disorder and need medication.

Such a person is probably clueless about alcoholism, and the fact that
anti-anxiety drugs can have very similar consequences.

I not only had high anxiety, I had high shyness. I couldn't even walk
down the street, I HAD to drive. If I was driving in a car park and
some pedestrians were stupid enough to walk in the middle of the road,
I found that accelerating was a very effective means of getting them
out the way. In a supermarket, accelerating with a trolley was also
an effective method.

I was never drunk when I did this. Drinking helped me feel more calm.
This is the stuff I would do whilst NOT drinking.

>I want to know how to get out of being so ME centered.

Work the 12 Steps.

>How do you just get "over" it?
>Just do it?

I worked the 12 Steps. I still have very little control over what I
think or feel, but I have plenty of control over what I do.

>Just go to some meetings and listen?

No, that's the route to relapse. All you really need to hear in a
meeting is identification with the alcoholic problem.

>Be a resource for others that are
>having a hard time dealing without drinking? Do some charity work and spoon
>soup to people that have lost everything and given up? Go to work for Homes
>for Humanity and build homes for the homeless?

Those are all good things to do, but none are replacing the work of
the Steps. I think they'd be more rewarding to do after taking those
Steps.

--
Blue Moon

On Sat, 06 Mar 2004 22:31:10 GMT, Blue Moon <mfoco@hotmail.com> wrote:

>On Sat, 6 Mar 2004 11:43:50 -0600, "Kirk S."
><kspradling@nospamkc.rr.com> wrote:
>
>>What is the difference between a problem drinker and an alcoholic?

A problem drinker don't have to go to all them damn meetings.



<....THIS SPACE FOR RENT....>

> >
> >>What is the difference between a problem drinker and an
alcoholic?
>
> A problem drinker don't have to go to all them damn meetings.


old, old, joke, but cute!

Bob W. wrote :

>On Sat, 06 Mar 2004 22:31:10 GMT, Blue Moon <mfoco@hotmail.com> wrote:
>
>>On Sat, 6 Mar 2004 11:43:50 -0600, "Kirk S."
>><kspradling@nospamkc.rr.com> wrote:
>>
>>>What is the difference between a problem drinker and an alcoholic?
>
>A problem drinker don't have to go to all them damn meetings.

Do you not like going to the meetings?

On 7 Mar 2004 06:32:22 -0600, Ron Ziewitzski <ronnyz@privacy.net>
wrote:

>Bob W. wrote :
>
>>On Sat, 06 Mar 2004 22:31:10 GMT, Blue Moon <mfoco@hotmail.com> wrote:
>>
>>>On Sat, 6 Mar 2004 11:43:50 -0600, "Kirk S."
>>><kspradling@nospamkc.rr.com> wrote:
>>>
>>>>What is the difference between a problem drinker and an alcoholic?
>>
>>A problem drinker don't have to go to all them damn meetings.
>
>Do you not like going to the meetings?

Are you done with those night classes? If so maybe you can take one in
reading comprehension.
Just a thought.
I really like you Ron, That's why I'm trying to help you.



<....THIS SPACE FOR RENT....>

<Bob W.> skrev i melding
news:0ffedd783ea29c8c08a6d9956952b952@news.teranew s.com...
> On 7 Mar 2004 06:32:22 -0600, Ron Ziewitzski <ronnyz@privacy.net>
> wrote:
>
> >Bob W. wrote :
> >
> >>On Sat, 06 Mar 2004 22:31:10 GMT, Blue Moon <mfoco@hotmail.com> wrote:
> >>
> >>>On Sat, 6 Mar 2004 11:43:50 -0600, "Kirk S."
> >>><kspradling@nospamkc.rr.com> wrote:
> >>>
> >>>>What is the difference between a problem drinker and an alcoholic?
> >>
> >>A problem drinker don't have to go to all them damn meetings.
> >
> >Do you not like going to the meetings?
>
> Are you done with those night classes? If so maybe you can take one in
> reading comprehension.
> Just a thought.
> I really like you Ron, That's why I'm trying to help you.
>
>
>
> <....THIS SPACE FOR RENT....>

On Sun, 7 Mar 2004 21:54:46 +0100, "Jeanne de`Arc"
<Jeanne@microsoft.com> wrote:

>
><Bob W.> skrev i melding
>news:0ffedd783ea29c8c08a6d9956952b952@news.terane ws.com...
>> On 7 Mar 2004 06:32:22 -0600, Ron Ziewitzski <ronnyz@privacy.net>
>> wrote:
>>
>> >Bob W. wrote :
>> >
>> >>On Sat, 06 Mar 2004 22:31:10 GMT, Blue Moon <mfoco@hotmail.com> wrote:
>> >>
>> >>>On Sat, 6 Mar 2004 11:43:50 -0600, "Kirk S."
>> >>><kspradling@nospamkc.rr.com> wrote:
>> >>>
>> >>>>What is the difference between a problem drinker and an alcoholic?
>> >>
>> >>A problem drinker don't have to go to all them damn meetings.
>> >
>> >Do you not like going to the meetings?
>>
>> Are you done with those night classes? If so maybe you can take one in
>> reading comprehension.
>> Just a thought.
>> I really like you Ron, That's why I'm trying to help you.
>>
>
>Zack its not nice to troll an alcoholic. They are so weak.
>They might break down and start drinking again.
>
> /\,,/\
>Jd`A (*-*)__,
> ``
>
>
>
>
Who's Zack? And who are you?



<....THIS SPACE FOR RENT....>

<Bob W.> skrev i melding
news:0ffedd783ea29c8c08a6d9956952b952@news.teranew s.com...
> On 7 Mar 2004 06:32:22 -0600, Ron Ziewitzski <ronnyz@privacy.net>
> wrote:
>
> >Bob W. wrote :
> >
> >>On Sat, 06 Mar 2004 22:31:10 GMT, Blue Moon <mfoco@hotmail.com> wrote:
> >>
> >>>On Sat, 6 Mar 2004 11:43:50 -0600, "Kirk S."
> >>><kspradling@nospamkc.rr.com> wrote:
> >>>
> >>>>What is the difference between a problem drinker and an alcoholic?
> >>
> >>A problem drinker don't have to go to all them damn meetings.
> >
> >Do you not like going to the meetings?
>
> Are you done with those night classes? If so maybe you can take one in
> reading comprehension.
> Just a thought.
> I really like you Ron, That's why I'm trying to help you.
>

Zack its not nice to troll an alcoholic. They are so weak.
They might break down and start drinking again.

/\,,/\
Jd`A (*-*)__,
``

<Bob W.> skrev i melding
news:082d1c056ec6a726cc7c11ddbe9ec096@news.teranew s.com...
> On Sun, 7 Mar 2004 21:54:46 +0100, "Jeanne de`Arc"
> <Jeanne@microsoft.com> wrote:
>
> >
> ><Bob W.> skrev i melding
> >news:0ffedd783ea29c8c08a6d9956952b952@news.terane ws.com...
> >> On 7 Mar 2004 06:32:22 -0600, Ron Ziewitzski <ronnyz@privacy.net>
> >> wrote:
> >>
> >> >Bob W. wrote :
> >> >
> >> >>On Sat, 06 Mar 2004 22:31:10 GMT, Blue Moon <mfoco@hotmail.com>
wrote:
> >> >>
> >> >>>On Sat, 6 Mar 2004 11:43:50 -0600, "Kirk S."
> >> >>><kspradling@nospamkc.rr.com> wrote:
> >> >>>
> >> >>>>What is the difference between a problem drinker and an alcoholic?
> >> >>
> >> >>A problem drinker don't have to go to all them damn meetings.
> >> >
> >> >Do you not like going to the meetings?
> >>
> >> Are you done with those night classes? If so maybe you can take one in
> >> reading comprehension.
> >> Just a thought.
> >> I really like you Ron, That's why I'm trying to help you.
> >>
> >
> >Zack its not nice to troll an alcoholic. They are so weak.
> >They might break down and start drinking again.
> >
> > /\,,/\
> >Jd`A (*-*)__,
> > ``
> >
> >
> >
> >
> Who's Zack? And who are you?
>
My dear, don`t be such a fool. You are Zack.
Did you forgot ?