Anonymity

I just said something to Rosie about "Well, I'm not going to break anonymity
by "outing" anybody, . . . " and it made me think. The "Anonymous" part is
what we give to other alcoholics, but our own anonymity is waivable.

It helps me to stay sober by simply being transparent about my alcoholism.
If someone asks me if I want a drink, I usually just say: "No, thanks" but
if they push it (as some people just have to do) I say: "No, really, I'm an
alcoholic." <laughing> That usually disconcerts them enough that they drop
it.

While waiting for opposing counsel to show up at a pretrial hearing one day,
the judge was talking about having just added "papers" to a DUI sentence and
wondered if it did any good. I told him that it had done me a world of good
and discussed my experience in jail, relapse prevention and after care. It
was a good discussion and I don't think that it prejudiced him against me in
any way.

I don't really know if transparency is good for anyone else but I was just
wondering whether anyone else uses it in their sobriety.

"Dan McGown" <dmcgown@adelphia.net> wrote in message
newsridnWYGj8MIe7LcRVn-jQ@adelphia.com...
> I just said something to Rosie about "Well, I'm not going to break
anonymity
> by "outing" anybody, . . . " and it made me think. The
"Anonymous" part is
> what we give to other alcoholics, but our own anonymity is
waivable.
>
> It helps me to stay sober by simply being transparent about my
alcoholism.
> If someone asks me if I want a drink, I usually just say: "No,
thanks" but
> if they push it (as some people just have to do) I say: "No,
really, I'm an
> alcoholic." <laughing> That usually disconcerts them enough that
they drop
> it.
>
> While waiting for opposing counsel to show up at a pretrial hearing
one day,
> the judge was talking about having just added "papers" to a DUI
sentence and
> wondered if it did any good. I told him that it had done me a
world of good
> and discussed my experience in jail, relapse prevention and after
care. It
> was a good discussion and I don't think that it prejudiced him
against me in
> any way.
>
> I don't really know if transparency is good for anyone else but I
was just
> wondering whether anyone else uses it in their sobriety.
>
Dr. Bob on Tradition Eleven

We need always maintain personal anonymity
at the level of press, radio and films.


Dr. Bob, co-founder of AA, commented on Tradition Eleven as follows:
Since our Tradition on anonymity designates the exact level where the
line should be held, it must be obvious to everyone who can read and
understand the English language that to maintain anonymity at any
other
level is definitely a violation of this Tradition.

The AA who hides his identity from his fellow AA by using only a
given
name violates the Tradition just as much as the AA who permits his
name
to appear in the press in connection with matters pertaining to AA.

The former is maintaining his anonymity ABOVE the level of press,
radio, and films, and the latter is maintaining his anonymity BELOW
the
level of press, radio, and films - whereas the Tradition states that
we
should maintain our anonymity AT the level of press, radio, and
films.

Reprinted from the February 1969 Grapevine

> Dr. Bob on Tradition Eleven
>
> We need always maintain personal anonymity
> at the level of press, radio and films.
>
>
> Dr. Bob, co-founder of AA, commented on Tradition Eleven as follows:
> Since our Tradition on anonymity designates the exact level where the
> line should be held, it must be obvious to everyone who can read and
> understand the English language that to maintain anonymity at any
> other
> level is definitely a violation of this Tradition.
>
> The AA who hides his identity from his fellow AA by using only a
> given
> name violates the Tradition just as much as the AA who permits his
> name
> to appear in the press in connection with matters pertaining to AA.
>
> The former is maintaining his anonymity ABOVE the level of press,
> radio, and films, and the latter is maintaining his anonymity BELOW
> the
> level of press, radio, and films - whereas the Tradition states that
> we
> should maintain our anonymity AT the level of press, radio, and
> films.
>
> Reprinted from the February 1969 Grapevine
>

Now that is interesting and it gives me a lot to think about. On the one
hand, I am enough of an existentialist to accept responsibility for my own
decisions and enough of a follower of logic not to be satisfied with bare
"appeals to higher authority." On the other hand, I have to accept
authority that is demonstrated to work and Dr. Bob did discern a program
that demonstrably does work.

Damn, Bob, does this prove once again that I'm not the center of the
universe and source of all insight? Rats, foiled again.

"What'll we do tonight, Brain?" "The same thing we do every night, Pinky,
plot to take over the world."

Obviously, I'm now tired enough to be silly so maybe I'll be able to sleep
tonight. Wouldn't that be a nice change? Good night, Bob, and thank you
for you insight.

Best regards,
Dan

> The AA who hides his identity from his fellow AA by using only a
> given
> name violates the Tradition just as much as the AA who permits his
> name
> to appear in the press in connection with matters pertaining to AA.

Oh hell, Bob, I can't sleep anyway and I was thinking, doesn't this just
counsel us away from breaking anonymity "in connection with matters
pertaining to AA?" It doesn't really mean that we need to disguise that
fact that we, individually, are alcoholics, does it?

"Dan McGown" <dmcgown@adelphia.net> wrote in message
news:-aadnQS5i-d6crLcRVn-pQ@adelphia.com...
> > The AA who hides his identity from his fellow AA by using only a
> > given
> > name violates the Tradition just as much as the AA who permits his
> > name
> > to appear in the press in connection with matters pertaining to AA.
>
> Oh hell, Bob, I can't sleep anyway and I was thinking, doesn't this just
> counsel us away from breaking anonymity "in connection with matters
> pertaining to AA?" It doesn't really mean that we need to disguise that
> fact that we, individually, are alcoholics, does it?
>
>

Anonymity is for outside the fellowship -- not inside.

For example, someone in your group has to have some routine (meaning it's on
them and not me) surgery and needs a little moral support from the folks in
his group. Try going to the hospital and asking what room "John D." is in.

Another aspect of anonymity is that I don't tell others I know you from or
saw you at AA meetings. I just tell folks we have a mutual acquaintance.
If they ask, it's just a couple of guys named Bill and Bob.

Bobby L

> Anonymity is for outside the fellowship -- not inside.
>
> For example, someone in your group has to have some routine (meaning it's
on
> them and not me) surgery and needs a little moral support from the folks
in
> his group. Try going to the hospital and asking what room "John D." is
in.
>
> Another aspect of anonymity is that I don't tell others I know you from or
> saw you at AA meetings. I just tell folks we have a mutual acquaintance.
> If they ask, it's just a couple of guys named Bill and Bob.
>
> Bobby L

Thanks for the thoughts, Bobby. Conversation helps with the "white nights."
Of all of the things that I could hate about the disease, the one that is
the most aggravating on a daily basis is the sleeplessness.

dan,
i was "raised" in AA to use both of my names (first and last) when
introducing myself in an AA meeting.
anonymity in an AA meeting, makes no sense!


"hi, my name is rosie....................if you need me, my name is
in the phone book!"

--
rosie
"I think Senator Kerry should be proud of his record. No, I don't
think he lied."
.................................................. ...GEORGE W. BUSH
(8-25-04)








"Dan McGown" <dmcgown@adelphia.net> wrote in message
newsridnWYGj8MIe7LcRVn-jQ@adelphia.com...
: I just said something to Rosie about "Well, I'm not going to break
anonymity
: by "outing" anybody, . . . " and it made me think. The
"Anonymous" part is
: what we give to other alcoholics, but our own anonymity is
waivable.
:
: It helps me to stay sober by simply being transparent about my
alcoholism.
: If someone asks me if I want a drink, I usually just say: "No,
thanks" but
: if they push it (as some people just have to do) I say: "No,
really, I'm an
: alcoholic." <laughing> That usually disconcerts them enough that
they drop
: it.
:
: While waiting for opposing counsel to show up at a pretrial
hearing one day,
: the judge was talking about having just added "papers" to a DUI
sentence and
: wondered if it did any good. I told him that it had done me a
world of good
: and discussed my experience in jail, relapse prevention and after
care. It
: was a good discussion and I don't think that it prejudiced him
against me in
: any way.
:
: I don't really know if transparency is good for anyone else but I
was just
: wondering whether anyone else uses it in their sobriety.
:
:

dan,
how long has you been suffering with these sleepless nights?

--
rosie
"I think Senator Kerry should be proud of his record. No, I don't
think he lied."
.................................................. ...GEORGE W. BUSH
(8-25-04)








"Dan McGown" <dmcgown@adelphia.net> wrote in message
news:9dadnSjJB5aOaLLcRVn-jQ@adelphia.com...
: > Anonymity is for outside the fellowship -- not inside.
: >
: > For example, someone in your group has to have some routine
(meaning it's
: on
: > them and not me) surgery and needs a little moral support from
the folks
: in
: > his group. Try going to the hospital and asking what room "John
D." is
: in.
: >
: > Another aspect of anonymity is that I don't tell others I know
you from or
: > saw you at AA meetings. I just tell folks we have a mutual
acquaintance.
: > If they ask, it's just a couple of guys named Bill and Bob.
: >
: > Bobby L
:
: Thanks for the thoughts, Bobby. Conversation helps with the
"white nights."
: Of all of the things that I could hate about the disease, the one
that is
: the most aggravating on a daily basis is the sleeplessness.
:
:

" rosie" <readandpost@yahooORhotmail.com> wrote in message
news:NH%Xc.16923$sO2.10689@twister.rdc-kc.rr.com...
> dan,
> how long has you been suffering with these sleepless nights?

That's harder to sort out than I thought it would be because my
recollections of its origins are impaired. For most of my life, I fell
asleep when my head hit the pillow. Then things changed. Some of it was
from drinking. Some of it was from thinking. Some of the trouble sleeping
was masked by the drinking. My recollection of its starting is lost in a
mixture of a fog of pain and a haze of alcohol. The reasons may have
changed over time. Now some of it is just that I still have trouble
sleeping in a bed because when you are alone in a bed you have to admit to
yourself that you are genuinely alone. After being married twice, first for
19 years and then for 18 years, being by myself is something that I am still
coming to grips with.

Information overshare?

not overshare at all...................i hope that your sleeping
patterns can return/get to
some normalcy, if not please talk to your doctor.
sleeping pills (nor a partner) are NOT the only solution!


--
rosie

"I think Senator Kerry should be proud of his record. No, I don't
think he lied."
.................................................. ...GEORGE W. BUSH
(8-25-04)














"Dan McGown" <dmcgown@adelphia.net> wrote in message
news:NK6dnW_f-sD5Na3cRVn-pg@adelphia.com...
:
: " rosie" <readandpost@yahooORhotmail.com> wrote in message
: news:NH%Xc.16923$sO2.10689@twister.rdc-kc.rr.com...
: > dan,
: > how long has you been suffering with these sleepless nights?
:
: That's harder to sort out than I thought it would be because my
: recollections of its origins are impaired. For most of my life, I
fell
: asleep when my head hit the pillow. Then things changed. Some of
it was
: from drinking. Some of it was from thinking. Some of the trouble
sleeping
: was masked by the drinking. My recollection of its starting is
lost in a
: mixture of a fog of pain and a haze of alcohol. The reasons may
have
: changed over time. Now some of it is just that I still have
trouble
: sleeping in a bed because when you are alone in a bed you have to
admit to
: yourself that you are genuinely alone. After being married twice,
first for
: 19 years and then for 18 years, being by myself is something that
I am still
: coming to grips with.
:
: Information overshare?
:
: