Fwd: Catholic Lads

"Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose woman."
The priest asks, "Is that you, little Matt Dirney?"
"Yes, Father, it is."
"And, who was the woman you were with?"
"I can't be tellin' you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."
"Well, Matthew, I'm sure to find out sooner or later, so you may as
well tell me now. Was it BrendaO'Malley?" "I cannot say."
"Was it Patricia Kelly?"
"I'll never tell."
"Was it Liz Shannon?"
"I'm sorry, but I'll not name her."
"Was it Cathy Morgan?"
"My lips are sealed."
"Was it Fiona McDonald, then?"
"Please, Father, I cannot tell you."
The priest sighs in frustration. "You're a steadfast lad, Matthew
Dirney, and I admire that. But you've sinned, and you must atone.
You cannot attend church for three months. Be off with you now." Matt
walks back to his pew. His friend Fred slides over and whispers, "What
'd you get?"
"Three month's vacation and five good leads," says Matt.

"Robert McGregor" <robert_mcgregor@yahoo.com.au> wrote in message
news:2gaairFio03U1@uni-berlin.de...
>
> "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose woman."
> The priest asks, "Is that you, little Matt Dirney?"
> "Yes, Father, it is."
> "And, who was the woman you were with?"
> "I can't be tellin' you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."
> "Well, Matthew, I'm sure to find out sooner or later, so you may as
> well tell me now. Was it BrendaO'Malley?" "I cannot say."
> "Was it Patricia Kelly?"
> "I'll never tell."
> "Was it Liz Shannon?"
> "I'm sorry, but I'll not name her."
> "Was it Cathy Morgan?"
> "My lips are sealed."
> "Was it Fiona McDonald, then?"
> "Please, Father, I cannot tell you."
> The priest sighs in frustration. "You're a steadfast lad, Matthew
> Dirney, and I admire that. But you've sinned, and you must atone.
> You cannot attend church for three months. Be off with you now." Matt
> walks back to his pew. His friend Fred slides over and whispers, "What
> 'd you get?"
> "Three month's vacation and five good leads," says Matt.
>
>
>
>

That was so cute I had to pass it on. Thanks for my first laugh so late in
the day. Keep em coming!
Best,
Gail

"Gail" <suninmyeyes@onmyporch.com> wrote in message news:<109vu4sb1q3hk0c@corp.supernews.com>...
> "Robert McGregor" <robert_mcgregor@yahoo.com.au> wrote in message
> news:2gaairFio03U1@uni-berlin.de...
> >
> > "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose woman."
> > The priest asks, "Is that you, little Matt Dirney?"
> > "Yes, Father, it is."
> > "And, who was the woman you were with?"
> > "I can't be tellin' you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."
> > "Well, Matthew, I'm sure to find out sooner or later, so you may as
> > well tell me now. Was it BrendaO'Malley?" "I cannot say."
> > "Was it Patricia Kelly?"
> > "I'll never tell."
> > "Was it Liz Shannon?"
> > "I'm sorry, but I'll not name her."
> > "Was it Cathy Morgan?"
> > "My lips are sealed."
> > "Was it Fiona McDonald, then?"
> > "Please, Father, I cannot tell you."
> > The priest sighs in frustration. "You're a steadfast lad, Matthew
> > Dirney, and I admire that. But you've sinned, and you must atone.
> > You cannot attend church for three months. Be off with you now." Matt
> > walks back to his pew. His friend Fred slides over and whispers, "What
> > 'd you get?"
> > "Three month's vacation and five good leads," says Matt.
> >
> >
> >
> >
>
> That was so cute I had to pass it on. Thanks for my first laugh so late in
> the day. Keep em coming!
> Best,
> Gail

Groan!

almost as bad as the other Catholic Priest joke...

little Johnny goes to confession and says

"bless me Father I have sinned"
"Yes son?"
"I had naughty thoughts about Susan Wilson"
"What naughty thoughts son?
"I, er..."
"Yes?"
"I thought about kissing her"
"5 Hail Marys my son. Anything else?
"Yes Father, I dreamt I was having sex with her"
"10 Hail Marys for those filthy thoughts... Anything else?"
"Yes I dreamt she was giving me a blow job!"
"10 Our Fathers"
"But Father, old Father Thomas never used to give 10 Our Fathers for a blow job"
"What did he give then my son?"
"A Mars Bar and a packet of smarties!"