In article <1179166907.421396.38540@n59g2000hsh.googlegroups. com>,
Tomas <tvoncarlshausen@gmail.com> wrote:

> In the past 6 weeks I have had 3 scripts for 40 5mg Diazepam, for an 8
> day detox. Ok its been fine for 3 days, taking 70mg a day, then pills
> run out, I start shaking again, so back drinking again, get so ill and
> depressed from drinking, take another script etc etc.... I am
> doubtful if my doc will prescribe me anymore diazepam anymore, and I
> just fear living and shutting my eyes without either, but I know I
> have to stop drinking. I guess I'm just using diazepam as solid
> alcohol. I have been clean for 9 months previously using the rooms
> of AA but feel so ashamed to go back, I know I have to, and I really
> think I'm prepared to surrender this time, but first I need to put the
> cork in the bottle and dont know how to detox.... would librium be
> better, and maybe some strong sedative to help me sleep??? The
> problem with diazepam is it just makes me feel a bit high and starts
> off the whole cycle again... Just any hints on getting a week sober
> and clean would be appreciated... TIA

Short answer, don't detox yourself from Valium. It truly can be
dangerous to your life. Do it under a doctor's supervision is what I
found out the hard way.

Over thirty years ago I was told by a doctor during a routine physical
exam that, "You know, don't you, that you're a drug abuser?" I became
incensed and responded that I knew no such thing, that I thought what I
was doing, and done for years, was medically called for, and pointed out
that I'd never taken a single pill that he'd not prescribed. He merely
said, "Well we know a lot more these days than we did when I began
prescribing them to you." I was so pissed at being referred to as an
abuser that I walked out of his office, never went back, and immediately
stopped taking my normal (or any) 120 mgs. per day of Valium.

Well, for the next few weeks I had many, many periods of shaking,
out-of-body experiences, sweats, chills, weird sounds in my ears,
including 'thundering', and numerous other complaints. They then
gradually cleared up, and I took no more Valium for many, many years
until, after I'd explained my history, a new doctor insisted that low
dosage usage for short periods of time would be safe for me. I've done
that, with no difficulty. But, I never want to go through such a
withdrawal again, so I'm careful, and never take more than a tablet or
two in a day and never more than for one or two days, and no more often
than once or twice a year.

I've been told by several doctors since that sudden cold-turkey can
literally kill a person.

So, by all means, QUIT the Valium. But, do it with a doc's help.

ABOVE ALL, get back into the program, and attend meetings. Quit the
alcohol.

Almost all of us have lapsed from time to time, and every one of us
knows that we all need help occasionally. Only a jerk will 'judge you'.
I'm certain that there will be LOTS of folk who will gladly offer a hand
to help you. Friend, take all the help you can get, especially when
it's offered with such understanding and compassion. Sure, no one will
compromise about the fact that we need to totally quit, or that we're
all total addicts.

Any AA group will have members who know exactly what you're going
through is like, and they'll help you.

In the end, of course, we all have to do the actual job of quitting
ourselves. God knows, if I'd have been able to do it, I'd have hired
someone to quit for me; but with the help of the program and the
fellowship, I'm sober now and have reasonable hope of remaining so. I
am happy being sober, and haven't even wanted or had a yen for a drink
in quite a while. I'm proud of having made some progress in controlling
my disease, but I'm also grateful beyond belief that AA and the
fellowship was there for me and shepherded me through the process, . .
and for the knowledge that if I screw up and relapse, they'll welcome me
back with open arms, and will try even harder to help me get sober again.

No one will think less of you. Every one of us is exactly like you.
Every time you reach out for help you'll find that many hands are
reaching right back to offer that help you need and want.

HH