On Sat, 23 Dec 2006 07:26:47 -0600, reporter74@________.com, in
message ID <kabqo2d693hkgl7hq9e0uhco7pu1iocedc@4ax.com>, in the
newsgroup alt.recovery.na wrote:

>Someone dressed to look like Santa Claus has been dropping objects
>that resemble red-hots candy on children throughout the United States.
>Once the child eats this object, it takes exactly eight seconds and
>the child explodes, leaving no remains. Thousands of children have
>already exploded, and it's estimated that as many as 200,000 more
>children have these look-alike candies. Children have exploded in
>every state in the US, and several have been reported to have exploded
>in Canada and Mexico. An anonymous letter was found attached to a
>small pouch of these fake candies and it states that on December 25th
>at exactly midnight these children will return to their homes, but
>they will be reindeers for the remainder of their lives. No one knows
>if this is true, or someone wrote this letter as a prank. The FBI is
>investigating, but so far they have no leads about the whereabouts of
>these children or why these phoney candies make them explode. It is
>known that when adults eat them, nothing happens.
>
>The Federal governmental officials are asking for the help of all
>Americans. If you see any objects which resemble these candies,
>please take them to your local police immediately. If you see any
>children explode, please take note, and take a photo if possible.
>
>This is becoming an epidemic. Please keep your children at home, and
>keep them safely locked up, until this over. This is a serious matter
>and the government needs all leads and tips. If you see something
>that might pertain to this, please contact your local law enforcement
>immediately. Keep your children safe, lock them up immediately.
>
>If your child explodes, please contact the FBI and be sure to file a
>claim with your insurance company. Replacement children will be
>available after the first of the year, but supplies are limited.
>Presently there are only 1000 replacements available. As a parent of
>an exploded child, you will be required to bid on Ebay for your
>replacement child. This will be a bid and bid again auction, not a Buy
>it Now offer.Shipping and handling are extra. Be sure to have a valid
>Ebay account if you lost your child from explosion. Poachers will not
>be allowed to bid on Ebay for replacement children.
>
>BEWARE this Santa terrorist is armed and dangerous.

Looks like Bush mistakenly left Lapland off the "Axis of Evil". :-)